


Banana Appeal

by GuileandGall



Series: The Fifth [6]
Category: Saints Row
Genre: Drunkenness, F/M, Other, Unrequited Lust
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-19
Updated: 2017-02-19
Packaged: 2018-09-25 13:03:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 961
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9821723
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GuileandGall/pseuds/GuileandGall
Summary: A very tipsy Carlos winds up in the middle of a conversation that leaves him a little hot under the collar.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Someone sent me this prompt a while back, but I lost the ask in the blog switch.

**Banana Appeal**

Pierce and Carlos were halfway through the bottle the boss had stashed away in a desk drawer when Cinq fell into the chair between them. Washington’s head lulled to the right and leaned way back to stare up at the other man for a moment. When he disappeared from his vision, Pierce’s chin dropped forward like someone shoved it and his head bobbed like one of those hula girls on the dashboard of a Compton.

“What’s up, cuz?” he said, his drunkenness slurring his speech like a snake with a lisp.

Cinq chuckled, leaning forward and filling a glass nearly to the tippy top from the same bottle that he and Carlos had been downing shots from. “Clearly nothing,” he answered giving his cousin the once over.

Carlos still didn’t really see it. The family resemblance between Pierce and the boss. Sure, they both wore their hair close cropped, but that was about it. Cinq had about six inches on the other lieutenant and a full foot on Carlos, but they really looked nothing alike. The boss’ light eyes always looked possessed even when he was smiling, while Pierce’s warm brown eyes were welcoming and jovial, twinkling like Santa’s when he laughed.

“That’s not really fair.”

“And you’re about one shot from unconsciousness.”

“Bullshit,” Pierce spat, hissing again as he gestured. Glass still in hand he jabbed a finger in the air at his cousin. “I know how to hold my liquor.”

“So, do I,” Shaundi cooed as she joined them.

“By the ears?” Cinq inquired.

Carlos nearly choked on a laugh and the rotgut whiskey after having chosen the wrong moment to nurse a sip from his glass. The attempt at a cool chuckle turned into a coughing fit.

“Bass, man,” Cinq reminded as he clapped the young man on the back. “Breathe air, swallow spit.”

Shaundi’s giggle wiggled down Carlos’ spine. As he watched her pour an inch of the dark coffee-colored liquid into a glass, he felt the tingle wrap around the base of his cock. _Dios_ , _she_ _’s so pretty_ , he thought as his eyes settled blatantly on her breasts.

“Don’t stare.” The low voice, breathy at his ear, didn’t help the sensation causing his jeans to suddenly feel too tight.

“Sorry,” he whispered way too loud, he realized when Shaundi looked at him.

“For what?”

He stared at her mouth, her dazzling smile, and couldn’t rip his gaze away as it puckered when she raised the glass. _Whiskey would taste so much better on her lips_ , he thought. Again, he realized he was staring. “Nada.”

“Mmm,” she replied with a nod. Her finger traced the rim of her glass and her warm gaze remained on him as he watched her. That fingertip dipped between her lips.

“That’s not fair at all.” Cinq’s baritone yanked Carlos out of his reverie.

“What?” Shaundi asked, a shrug and a playfully innocent look, complete with eyelash batting, met the boss’ easy grin.

Pierce seemed to come back down to earth for a moment. “Hey, man. What happened to you last night? You end up playing doctor with that nurse, or did that vampire slut trick you?”

Cinq downed a large swallow of whiskey, which left him drawing a breath between gritted teeth before he answered. “Nah. This girl dressed as a banana walked up and told me I needed more potassium in my diet. So, I took her back to the crib and went down on her.”

With a sputter, they were all covered in rotgut. Shaundi cackled with laughter, no apology in sight. Her glass crashed loudly against the table as she contorted with the violence of her glee. “You can’t be serious.”

“The hell I ain’t,” Cinq countered. He took another big swig, nearly emptying his glass before setting it down. Then he leaned back, thrusting his hips forward as he dug his phone out of his pocket.

Carlos again stared, noticing the way the boss’ trousers clung to his thighs but loosened at his knees. Trailing upwards, his gaze centered just left of his zipper. Despite the shade of the fabric and the low light in the room, Carlos was sure he could make out a remarkable silhouette. When the boss sat upright again, the young lieutenant blinked several times, his gaze moving to the device in the boss’ hand.

“Check this out.”

Sure enough, the photo on the phone was of a woman wearing a fully body banana costume. He might not be able to make out the shape of the rest of her, but she had a pretty face and long, shapely legs. Given that offer, Carlos probably would have taken a nibble of that banana too.

“Damn, boss,” Shaundi crooned. “Did you get her out of the costume?”

“Nah. That would be besides the point.” He jabbed at the screen with a long finger and sat the device on the arm of his chair. “But I’m pretty sure I met my potassium quotient for the year.”

While Shaundi laughed and Carlos imagined, Pierce huffed.

“What’s the matter, cuz?” Cinq asked as he picked up his glass.

“You had two foxes crawling all over your jock and you pick up some chick dressed as a banana,” he crooned in disbelief.

“I don’t know, Pierce,” Shaundi interjected. “That was a really good line.”

Cinq nodded in agreement.

Washington shook his head. “Long as I’ve known you, I will never understand you.”

“One can only hope.”

“Fuck you, man.”

“Love you, too, primo.”

Carlos chuckled, dipping his nose back toward his glass. The sip burned all the way down. It felt like his entire body was on fire, and he knew it’d stay that way for a while—possibly even after the buzz wore off.

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt Fill. 2014.11.28 “She was dressed as a banana and told me that I need more potassium in my diet. Of course, I went down on her.” (Anon)


End file.
